In Which “Actress” Jamie Chung Tries To Steal My Dead Dog

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It was an unsuspecting Thursday. Nicole got an equally unsuspecting comment on her blog about how some chick named Jamie Chung was stealing our tweets. And, so, with ultimate dedication, we went to this Twitter account. First I noticed that she has 3,000+ followers and then, MY GOD, I noticed that her most recent tweet about LOST was WORD FOR ACTUAL WORD MY TWEET ABOUT LOST. And then, upon scrolling, Nicole and I are shouting to each other across the apartment. “That’s MY TWEET about unlimited mimosas!” she exclaims. “And, that’s THE TO-DO LIST I FINISHED!” I yell, exasperatedly.

And so I realize that she has been blatantly ripping off my tweets, as well as Nicole’s, Andrea’s, and Jamie Lovely’s for what seems like a good solid four months or so. And then Twitter blew up over it, while also informing us that this Jamie Chung person is some sort of pseudo-celebrity who was on the Real World and some sorority show and while I believe I should have my facts straight, I really don’t care.

Because, one of two things is happening here: the actual actual actual Jamie Chung who is semi-famous is stealing all the funny from myself and my friends. OR, which, admittedly, might even be better, someone is IMPERSONATING JAMIE CHUNG AND THEN, ON TOP OF IT, STEALING ALL OUR TWEETS. Like, what? WHAT THE ACTUAL WHAT WHAT WHAT.

So, I decided to investigate further. And, dear readers, what I found was HORRIFIC. I scrolled. And I scrolled. And I clicked “more” until I could not anymore and YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE THIS BULLSHIT.

JAMIE CHUNG OR A JAMIE CHUNG IMPERSONATOR HAS, NO KIDDING, NO ACTUAL KIDDING, BEEN STEALING MY “TWITTER IDENTITY” SINCE APRIL 26 OF TWO THOUSAND NINE.

APRIL! TWENTY! SIX! OF! TWO! THOUSAND! AND! NINE!

As in, this bitch THIS BITCH has been stealing MY tweets FOR AN ENTIRE YEAR. As far as I can tell, the stealing of my friend’s tweets seems to have happened recently, BUT ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

THIS CRAZY PERSON HAS BEEN STEALING MY LIFE FOR A YEAR?

SHE’S EVEN TRYING TO STEAL THE DEATH OF MY DOG. Chom Chom! Tommy! Our beloved pet!

dfg;lkjdf;glkjdfg;lkjdfglk!!! And fkgjdftoeisdlkgjfdlk!!! And WHAT THE EFF!? Dude, Jamie Chung, GET YOUR OWN DEAD DOG. That’s our Chom Chom! WE LOVED HIM YOU DIDN’T EVEN KNOW HIM!

Jamie Chung, THE JIG IS UP. It’s time that you must now get your own goddamn life and let me have mine back. You are no longer allowed to gain sympathy from your 3,000+ followers for the loss of your dog Tommy, nor did you finish YOUR ENTIRE TO-DO list, nor was it your weekend that was so amazing you want to keep it in your pocket. MY DOG. MY TO-DO LIST. MY WEEKEND!

In fact, here’s the deal Jamie Chung, IF THAT’S YOUR REAL NAME. If you’re going to thieve my entire identity and pass it off as your own, then you might as well take a few other things with you while you’re at it. I’d appreciate you doing my laundry, dealing with my heartache, and going to dinner with people I don’t like going to dinner with.

You’re not allowed to just LIVE MY HAPPY MOMENTS. When I’m in a bad mood, it’s your fault, Jamie Chung, and YOU MUST FIX IT. When a boy doesn’t want to be with me, I’m sicking him on you, Jamie Chung, and you’re taking my heartbreak WITH IT.

I’m going to go ahead and take my awesome life out for a nice night on the town this weekend, Jamie Chung, and YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO STEAL IT. You know what you get? YOU GET MY HANGOVER, YOU SNATCH. And I’m going to drink whiskey and I’m not even going to eat before I go to bed and my hangover is going to put you, JAMIE CHUNG, out of commission for AN ENTIRE DAY.

HOW’S THAT FOR YOU, JAMIE CHUNG!?

I’m really glad that your celebrity life is so boring that you have to steal my non-celebrity, but clearly awesome, life. Go me. I win. You lose.

Kiss kiss bang bang.

61 people added their two cents. Add yours.

{ 57 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Veronica April 30, 2010 at 12:10 am

Wow… just wow. Is there anything that can be done to stop her/him?

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2 Tabitha April 30, 2010 at 12:59 am

Oh my friggin God. How messed up is she? Is she google famous? I have to check what she looks like. That’s seriously insane.

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3 Andrea - Caffeinate Me April 30, 2010 at 1:14 am

I mean, it’s literally the saddest, saddest, most pathetic thing fucking ever. Yeah, so, cool that my jokes are going out to your 3,000+ followers. They probably think I’m funny as hell. This is definitely top 5 best things that ever happened to me – MY LIFE IS AWESOME. SO SO AWESOME. SO PLAGIARIZABLY AWESOME.

I MADE THAT WORD UP.

I CAN’T STOP USING CAPS.

CHOM CHOM WAS SO FUCKING CUTE.

HI JAMIE.

HI NICOLE.

HI EVERYONE I SENT THIS POST TO.

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4 nicole antoinette April 30, 2010 at 10:32 am

HI ANDREA

HI ANDREA’S BROTHER WHO @ REPLIED ME YESTERDAY

HI EVERYONE SHE SENT THIS POST TO

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5 sal April 30, 2010 at 1:28 am

what a saddo!

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6 Kat April 30, 2010 at 1:52 am

At least now you have a funny anecdote for the next time someone asks you who would play you in a movie version of your life :)

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7 Hank April 30, 2010 at 1:59 am

This is so beyond weird that I can’t do anything but laugh and laugh. As I do with most of your delightfully amusing posts. But, wow, this is BIZARRE.

Maybe to get back at her I will start copying Jamie Chung’s tweets and we can get other people to do the same. Oh wait, then everyone would just be copying your tweets. Hm. I need a better vengeance plan.

And you know what the saddest part of all is? Those innocents caught in the crossfire. LIKE WHAT DID CHOM CHOM EVER DO TO ANYONE?! LEASE OF ALL JAMIE CHUNG? CAN’T SHE JUST LET CHOM CHOM REST IN PEACE?
-Hank

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8 peace April 30, 2010 at 3:03 am

that’s an account is a poser, and not the real actres, jamie chung, this is her official twitter account : twiter.com/jamiechung1

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9 googlover April 30, 2010 at 4:53 am

That is the most insane thing I have heard in a while. LOCO!
You should make this “Jamie” say some insane stuff!

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10 RondaMarie April 30, 2010 at 6:19 am

You know what I learned from all of this? I use the word bitch too much and I don’t say snatch often enough.

The part about the internet having its fair share of stupid bitches that would rather steal someone else’s life than live their own? I already knew that. Can she be reported to Twitter? I know when bloggers find their stuff plagiarized online they can report it to blogspot, wordpress, etc and get it taken down.

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11 Gini April 30, 2010 at 6:58 am

That is fucking WEIRD.

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12 Kristen April 30, 2010 at 7:52 am

Weird…and super lame! How can someone do that?! Can you complain to Twitter?

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13 DRB April 30, 2010 at 7:52 am

Jamie VAYROWN imitation and blatant ripping off of your actual actual words is the sincerest form of cyber-flattery.

MYWYNY!

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14 netmeg April 30, 2010 at 9:23 am

The ultimate duplicate content.

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15 Yaj April 30, 2010 at 9:25 am

They say flattery is the sincerest form of imitation but this Jamie (Chung) chick is just asking for an ass whopping.

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16 Kaci April 30, 2010 at 9:28 am

For real? What the fuck is wrong with people?

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17 lbluca77 April 30, 2010 at 9:32 am

Is it really that hard for people to come up with their own thoughts in 140 characters or less on twitter?

But then again she was on Real World. Those people can’t be trusted.

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18 Independence December 18, 2011 at 2:13 am

A little rationality lifts the quality of the debate here. Thanks for cotnribiutng!

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19 Ben April 30, 2010 at 10:00 am

At least don’t do it ONLINE. I mean, I’ve been getting sympathy about my dog Chom Chom for months now and you never found out…

wait…what?

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20 mary April 30, 2010 at 10:04 am

That’s a fake Jamie.

The real Jamie is jamiechung1… the person your talking about now had been stealing the orginal actors tweet as well but I guess that person thought your life was more interesting

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21 Jenn April 30, 2010 at 10:18 am

I read this out loud to KYLECOOPER and we laughed a lot.

Not at the fact that someone stole your life, but just in your general hilarity. I love you and KYLECOOPER will gladly shank a bitch if he needs to.

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22 netmeg April 30, 2010 at 10:20 am

Better register twolivesintranslation.com.

Just in case.

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23 Neil Andrew DuPaul April 30, 2010 at 10:26 am

Dude that movie is so awesomely underrated.

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24 Andrea V. Lewis April 30, 2010 at 10:27 am

Duh. She’s from the Real World. We should use the writing capabilities of MTV’s fame whoring Gen Y reality stars as a barometer. When those wannabes are actually able to string together ORIGINAL interesting sentences in 140 characters then we know that the world has finally come to an end. As of now it’s still going.

I’m an optimist. Can’t you tell?

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25 Carlos Miceli April 30, 2010 at 10:29 am

A-class bitch.

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26 Vixations April 30, 2010 at 10:54 am

Just got this:

Twitter error – This person has protected their tweets.

When I started reading the post it was working. Now? Not so much. SHE TOTALLY READ YOUR BLOG AND STARTED FEELING STUPID AND UNORIGINAL AND CUNT-Y SO SHE PROTECTED HER TWEETS.

What a fucking pussy. Hey Jamie Chung! STOP SUCKING.

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27 Joost Schuur April 30, 2010 at 11:41 am

Let’s consider Occam’s Razor here for a second, Jamie. Maybe you’re schizophrenic and you’re stealing you’re OWN TWEETS?

PS: If you mention Occam’s Razor in a blog comment, it makes you sound all smart and sophisticated and shit.

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28 Joost Schuur April 30, 2010 at 11:43 am

YOUR own tweets! Typo and your blog is totally haunted, because it automatically posted without me hitting submit.

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29 Jamie April 30, 2010 at 12:08 pm

No, seriously. Who is this stranger bitch? And why does she think she can be you? Except when she like, takes the day off from being Jamie Varon to be Nicole or me or Andrea or whoever the hell else.

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30 Princess Pointful April 30, 2010 at 12:20 pm

Man, I thought it was bad when there was this rash of blog-post stealing going on. But seriously, doesn’t it take longer to find a tweet to steal then to write 10 words on your own? Gah.

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31 suki April 30, 2010 at 1:18 pm

that is hilarious. jamie chung went to my high school. the real one did, at least. i don’t think they’re on a verified account, so maybe it’s not really her.. or the real her is really this bad. :p

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32 Lori April 30, 2010 at 1:46 pm

This is such crap. Get your own tweets lady! Just found this, it is Jamie Chung facebook. I am not on facebook (yeah, I know, me and like 5 other people in the world) . Jamie and Nicole, if you are reading this, I would check to see if JC is stealing your facebook messages too, cause clearly she can’t think for herself.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jamie-Chung/637524033

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33 Lacey Bean April 30, 2010 at 2:28 pm

HOLY SHIT. That is insane!! I noticed her tweets are now private. But you should totally start a hash tag and have everyone use it to get her kicked off. Something like “jamiechungstolemytweets

I think we could start a revolution.

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34 Toe April 30, 2010 at 3:10 pm

Wow, how desperate does this chick need to be to steal someone else’s tweets? That’s just sad.

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35 taylor April 30, 2010 at 3:21 pm

Jamie Chung clearly does not have a brain or life!!!! Who steals TWEETS!!! That is just WEIRDDDDD!! She needs other people’s lives to make up for the OH-SO-DULL-BORING-DRAB-MUNDANE AND RELENTLESS life she has. Ohhhh… to bad, so sad, love drab.

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36 katelin April 30, 2010 at 3:24 pm

when i saw this yesterday i thought it was the weirdest thing ever, but the fact that she was stealing your tweets for a year!?! now that’s just plain bizarre! i really hope that’s not her actual twitter or that she takes it down or something because that’s just bizarre.

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37 Kelly April 30, 2010 at 7:09 pm

CRAZY! I don’t understand why anyone would do that? Not only is that creepy, but it’s dumb!

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38 Robyn May 1, 2010 at 12:18 am

Aaaaand now her Twitter is protected. What a wackadoo. And just when I was going to start harassi-, I mean, following her. :-D

This is seriously ridiculous, but it IS a damn amusing anecdote. So, thanks, “Jamie Chung” for that. And who the hell impersonates a FAKE celebrity? Like, how does one grow up to be a Snookie-impersonator, I wonder? REVELATION: NEW LIFE GOAL…

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39 Tiffany May 1, 2010 at 2:22 pm

Yikes!

You do have a point, though, that this (possible?) celebrity thinks your normal life is more exciting than her own.

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40 Akirah May 1, 2010 at 6:11 pm

Totally unrelated: what kind of dog is that? I want one!

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41 Taylor May 2, 2010 at 6:54 am

Like, seriously??? Are you kidding me?? That’s absolutely ridiculous. Wtf.

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42 Jessica May 2, 2010 at 12:07 pm

I was following the drama on this and I was absolutely shocked. I’m not shocked that Jamie blocked her tweets now but your screen grab totally shocked me. But then again, considering she was on Road Rules and likely did some of the challenges, I wouldn’t put this past her, she’s not known for making good decisions to date.

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43 floreta May 2, 2010 at 9:12 pm

what the whackity whack whack??
who steals twitter identities?? i’ve heard of stealing blogs, but TWITTER!? that is L to the AME-O. Wow. What is the 21st century coming to these days?

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44 Jessica May 3, 2010 at 8:46 am

That is sooo CREEPY!!! Cease and Desist fake Jamie. And how cute was Tommy??!?!? Adorable doggy.

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45 Shannon May 3, 2010 at 11:57 am

I Tweeted you a couple of times that day when you realized it to say that it’s part of a fan network and it’s not her. I’m betting the real Jamie Chung has no idea. Whoever she is.

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46 seyma May 4, 2010 at 5:16 am

omg!! i just found you and i’m so glad i did that!! your blog is so much fun lady!! it’s awesome here!! i saw you guys’ blog design for Ben and i flipped!!

you seem to be so much fun.. but i didn’t see your follow button or something. how can i follow you??

love.xoxo

btw: i couldn’t find the average amount one should pay for a blog design in your website. how can i find it??

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47 Janis May 4, 2010 at 5:32 am

Proprietary hijacking tweets?
Evidently not!
Check out this from Weather Sealed: http://www.weathersealed.com/2010/05/03/all-your-tweets-are-belong-to-us/

Is there no couth?

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48 Angie Atkinson May 4, 2010 at 7:27 am

Wow, that sucks. I had someone stealing my blog via RSS awhile back and blew up FB, Twitter and various sites I own about it. Had the posts down in two hours. I hope you find the same satisfaction.

BTW, love your site!! Consider me your newest subscriber. :)

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49 KYLECOOPER May 4, 2010 at 4:01 pm

Almost as funny as when that kid stole your blog designs AMIRITE?

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50 David May 5, 2010 at 8:48 pm

I don’t use this word often, but I’m just going to say it.

You know what this girl is?

A cunt. Yes, a cunt.

I just thought she was a crazy bitch stealing your Tweets, but when I heard she even claimed your dead dog as her own, that’s when the bitch crossed the line and went straight to full blown cuntage in my book!

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51 Cornelius Aesop May 6, 2010 at 7:44 am

Her twitter is now set to private, want me to fling poo at her she’s definitely earned it. hehe

If a human stole my twitter posts they would sound weird so I’m pretty safe.

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52 Ashley May 7, 2010 at 2:56 pm

That’s pretty low. Stealing someone’s identity for credit card fraud is one thing, but Twitter? Seriously? Does she not have a single, creative neuron firing in her brain?

The biology of that statement is probably incorrect, but hey. I’m a writer, not a brain expert.

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53 Matty December 16, 2011 at 1:33 am

Thanks for helping me to see things in a dfifrenet light.

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54 zjmcyhqyvt December 17, 2011 at 1:19 am
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56 Ava Lee September 5, 2011 at 12:34 pm

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57 Treavioli November 4, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Looks like that twitter account was killed off. Hopefully no one else is stealing your tweets.

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